Dead

Aughh!! I swore I was going to bed right when I got home tonight, but I decided to wait up to buy something on eBay, an auction which I lost anyway and ended up doing a Buy It Now for the same thing. Crap, what a waste of my night.

On the lighter side, I’ve set my iPod up to play continuous Beatles in order from their first album to their last, and started it playing earlier today. Hours and hours of fun from “I Saw Her Standing There” to “Her Majesty,” not including the extra Anthologies, bargain mixes, Let It Be Naked, and Past Masters I and II which I’ve set up to come after all the normal albums. And I’ve found that George was right. Rubber Soul and Revolver really could have worked as a double album. I’m stopping it now at “Happiness is a Warm Gun,” so I can sleep. I’m reluctant to continue ’cause I know they’re going to break up in the end. .

Dream. Dream away…

I woke up today with “#9 Dream” in my head. Trippy song if you’ve never heard it. This is odd ’cause my dream was more goth than anything. I haven’t dealt with anything goth nor trippy recently so I don’t know where this dream came from.

The setting was a mall, or what we called a mall in the dream but as I think about it now, it wasn’t really one. The whole place was metallic and black colored, looking like something out of a Tim Burton movie.

I’ll add details later as I remember them, but the one thing that tied this whole thing together was this freaky girl that kept following me and asking me to help her keep from trying to kill herself which she finds addicting. (Been there, done that. Guess she knew I had experience talking people out of suicide.)

The next day rolls along and she shows me her latest piece of work: wrapping her arms tightly in barbed wire. I look to see holes in her arms that looked like bullet holes in the side of a car. You know, with the kind of frayed edges and just an empty hole. There were several of these from where she loosed and repositioned the barbed wire.

I look at the holes, look up at her and ask, “Are you a droid?” to which she answered, “Yes.” I think to myself, “Why is this droid intent on killing herself in such bizarre ways when she could just yank her battery or something?” Whatever, though. A lot of stuff is fuzzy, but I think I managed to talk her into taking off the remaining barbed wire.

Somewhere in my dream also appeared a giant Reptar-like (if you watch Rugrats, you’d know what this is) puffed up dinosaur. I don’t know what it related to. I just remember her showing me another suicide attempt while it was in the background. Maybe more will come back to me later.

Hmmf. Weird. I much more prefer the X-Men dreams.

Is this a test?

OK. What is with this week?

For starters, I’ve been exhausted from little sleep last weekend in NJ/NY/CT. This has caused the work week to just drag and me to be oblivious to almost everything.

Yesterday, I had to deal with all of this. The fact that I have to start job-hunting again is stressing beyond belief. It continued after I drenched myself. I never did eat yesterday until I got home, but back up a bit. Being fed up as I was, I planned on leaving work early to save what little sanity I had left. Didn’t happen, because of course, people came to me at 4:30 to print stuff. My skirt somewhat dries and I finally leave. The bus is like 15 minutes late. I make it to the Fenway meeting and manage to stay awake throughout the whole thing. Amazing, I know.

After the meeting, I take off right away. Said, “Hi,” to no one so I wouldn’t miss my train. Lately the orange line has been stalling like crazy, and I mean like stuck for 30+ minutes in one station. I’m reluctant to leave the train, ’cause you know when I finally do, the train will start moving. Wednesday, that’s what I did. I left at Downtown to run to the green line so I wouldn’t miss my commuter rail. I made it but just barely. This time, after the meeting, I thought it would be wise to not depend on the orange line. I walked to Prudential knowing I had plenty of time to spare. I get down there and it’s obvious that the train hasn’t come in a while ’cause there’s a horde of people downstairs. I figure, it’s good. This means it should be coming soon. Not so. I waited a good 20 minutes. Nothing. I leave the station and run back to Mass. Ave. station just to see the orange line leave. So much for catching the commuter rail. I call my mom and she offers to get me in Malden. The orange line is dead from one point on so they’re busing. I sit there forever and the train finally comes… and goes right by. AHHHHH!!!! Eventually, I get to Malden and go home. Egad.

The day is finally over and I can go to bed and then start another, hopefully better, day. Well, today I missed my bus at Alewife ’cause the red line delayed. Marvelous. But then I got to work and had a pumpkin muffin waiting for me. Thanks, Lori.

Dude, and here’s what just happened now. I just got an e-mail from my EX… the screwy one. No, the other screwy one. The one I haven’t seen or heard about in 4+ years and had since forgotten unless Paul and I are having one of our “who-has-the-most-screwed-up-ex” discussions. Right now I am beyond disturbed. Ah, the joys of having one’s own website and having a name unlike any other. This is one of those times where I wish I had a name like Smith or Jones. He said he found it when he was on Google looking up friends from high school. Yeah, and I’m really sure one of your high school friends was named Glinnen.

I usually check my e-mail like every couple of minutes hoping to have some e-mail entertainment or as of recently, people asking to hire me. So I hit “refresh” and see his name in my inbox. I’m like, “Maybe it’s a mistake or junk mail,” ’cause sometimes it happens. You get mail with a name of some person that’s the same as someone you might know; for instance, when I get e-mails saying, “Kara Glinnen wants to invite you to a new chat room.” Oh boy! Someone with the same name as me wants to invite ME somewhere! .

This is one person I never thought I’d hear from again. This one actually rivals my other ex as far as screwy is concerned. I’d say they’re about equal in different ways. You know, 12 of one, half-dozen of another. Anyway, it’s annoying. What a thing to see in your inbox at the end of an exhausting crappy week. Good thing the week is over soon.

I honestly do NOT believe this.

I just got back from “lunch,” if you even wanna call it that.

So I’m doing nothing here at work and the day is dragging. I’m informed that my last day here is August 27th which I expected, but this all means I have to start job searching again which I’ve found to be more annoying that most anything.

Finally lunchtime rolls around. I’m STARVING. I turn around just to see that it’s raining outside. Not too bad, but still bad enough for me to see out our window. (Most of the time it’s raining so lightly that it’s not noticable out the window.) Do I stay or do I go? I go, because I’m hungry.

I change into my sneakers and off I trudge out to the mall food court. It’s raining steadily, but just enough to be refreshing. Any more and it would be annoying. I get to the mall and head to the ATM. OMG no I did NOT forget my wallet at the office!! I forgot my wallet at the office. &^(!&!@#^!!!! AHHHHHH!!!! So now I have to go allllll the way back and get my wallet and come allllllllll the way back here and get food. Is it worth the effort my lazy self would go through? Yes, because I’m hungry.

I walk toward the exit just to see BUCKETS upon BUCKETS pouring out of the sky. This is NOT happening. It’s happening. I wait in the vestibule impatiently for it to lighten up. Five minutes later, it’s not lightening up. If I had left right away, I’d be back by now. I let out a sigh loud enough for people within a 10 m radius to hear and start out walking. Do Burlington parking lots NOT have sewer drains?! Apparently, not cause I feel like I’m wading through a pond all the way back. Every step I take is literally over 2″ into water. Oh here’s a shallow spot… nope. Here’s one… nope. What the heck, my shoes by now are drowned so I might as well wade back to the office.

In the meantime, my skirt is drenched, showing through, and sticking to me. Sexy, I know.

And ya know, RIGHT before I left, I looked at my wallet on my desk and thought to myself, “I need to get money out in order to eat.” How the heck did I forget my wallet?!?! Also, right as I walked out the door I think, “Maybe I should change into my pants before I leave… Nah. It’s not that bad out.” I guess I should be glad that I at least brought my pants today. At least I have something dry to wear. Hopefully, no one chews me out for wearing jeans, but I’ve hung my soaked skirt over my chair as a hint to why I’m in the jeans to begin with.

Hopefully, my skirt dries before the meeting tonight. And no, I didn’t end up walking back to get food. I’m starving now and… OH. Nice. Real nice. I just looked behind me just to see that it’s stopped raining for the time being. Great.

Even so, I’m nice and DRY and comfy aside from being starving. I don’t dare try to gamble the only spare clothing I’ve got today. What a sucky day!!! Only in Kara’s world.

I think I’ll make popcorn now.

Shh… Genius at work

I just realized my underwear is on inside-out today. You know you’re dead in the morning when this happens to you. Yes, I need to start sleeping more.

And now my underwear tag that’s supposed to be in on the inside, but is now on the outside, keeps sticking out of the top of my pants, visible to all. Dangit, where’s the Scotch tape?

“My Long Weekend” by Kara Glinnen

I guess any of you that would appreciate this already know everything about my Thurs-Sun afternoon things. No sense much of elaborating as there is not much to elaborate.

Simply put, it was an eventful weekend in NJ. When is it not? Gets more “interesting” each time I go. I found it ironic that normally CT is where all the interesting drama happens and this weekend I actually had to escape to CT to flee the drama.

Man, I really really really really x infinity hate NJ. The entire state should have giant boards nailed over it with a CONDEMNED sign hung over it. Auughhh. Everything smells bad. You pahk the cah and get out and just run to your indoor destination while holding your breath all the way there. Wasn’t even garbage day. I’d hate to smell it ON garbage day.

So now I’m at work and paying for the lack of sleep this weekend. Here is what I got for sleep. Thurs. night: 2:30am-6:30am, Fri. night: 1am-6:30am, Sat. night, 3:30am-6:30am. And the glutton for punishment I am went to Six Flags NJ on Sunday night and got home (away from home) at around 1:30ish I think and watched ASL stuff until I can’t remember when. Got up around 10ish and vented to poor Nancy for about an hour while she searched high and low for her knitting needles. (Paul, did she ever find them?) I’m happy to say with the no sleep I got, I was awake during the whole convention (I think). Easier to pay attention than the hearing conventions. I think then I’d have fallen asleep a long time ago.

And incidentally, the convention was amazing. Much better than last year as I can understand everything now. I can honestly say it was worth all the crap that I went through. That’s how good it was. If it weren’t for the convention, this could easily have ranked in the top 10 “Kill-me” weekends of my life. Also, thank you to Paul and fam for taking me out of NJ and into CT. You are so Moses.

After that, we did what we usually do in Hamden: We leave Hamden to go to a more interesting place. The agenda was to go to Hartford and get my bus ticket and then head out to Manchester where there’s a good variety of places to eat. Funny thing is we got lost the same way we did last time we tried to get from Hartford to Manchester, so everything looked wrongly familiar.

We finally found our way and noticed a new restaurant near the mall called Red Robin. DO NOT ever go to Red Robin. OK I guess I should be happy that I didn’t get food poisoning (yet) which would be worst case scenario. A couple things looked good on the menu. It was hard to decide, but I finally gave into my cravings of a “gourmet” BBQ burger. Now, when you think of the typical BBQ burger at your average grill restaurant (i.e. Applebees, TGIFridays, the 99, etc.), what do you think of? Dunno about you but I picture a burger just drenched in BBQ sauce that’s difficult to eat without getting it all over yourself. Add lettuce, tomato, cheese, etc. So here come the burgers. Where is the BBQ sauce? They must’ve gotten it wrong. But Kumal ordered the same thing as me and he got no sauce either. What’s up with that?!!? I guess that’s their definition of it? I say, “They so made this wrong!” Kumal: “Sad thing is, they made it right.” So both of us hate the place. We are not happy with the burger. Blah! I could’ve ordered the pasta like I wanted, but then again who knows how they could’ve screwed that up, too.

I made the bad choice of drinking with a completely empty stomach and half dead from the weekend. After the meal, I was dead. I actually slept on the bus and I can never manage to do that. I sat down and was out until we pulled into South Station.

Then I got home and stayed up until 3:30am ’cause I had just gone 4+ days without Internet and had to make up for lost time. Now I’m sitting at work and COMPLETELY vegetable-ized. 😛